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<p>Imported current content</p> <p><b>New page</b></p><div>Content-Transfer-Encoding: binary<br /> <br /> Subject: New Element Discovered: Administratium<br /> <br /> A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been tentatively named &quot;Administratium.&quot;<br /> <br /> Administratium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 111 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.<br /> <br /> These 312 particles are held together by a force called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.<br /> <br /> Since Administratium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Administratium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete when it would normally take less than one-second.<br /> <br /> Administratium has a normal half-life of three years. It does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons, deputy neutrons, and assistant deputy neutrons exchange places.<br /> <br /> In fact, Administratium mass will actually increase over time since each reorganization causes some morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.<br /> <br /> This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Administratium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as &quot;Critical Morass.&quot;<br /> <br /> You will know it when you see it.<br /> </div>

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